The Separation of Parent and Child // BBC Shows

            So, it’s been awhile since my last update. Reason being I moved into an apartment just off campus for the school year that, until recently, was without internet. But we’re online, now, and everything is going smoothly.

            Interesting thing, moving out. Moving out is like purgatory with regards to your parents. You want, and on some level need, to be independent from them, but at the same time they want, and on some level need, you to still be mildly dependent on them. Don’t get me wrong, they’re probably super happy to get you out of the house, but at the same time, they probably despise the fact that they have to let go.

            For example, shortly after I moved out I went camping with some friends a couple hours north of campus. Despite the fact that I should have probably told my parents where I was going just in case something happened, I did not on the basis that I felt it was none of their business. (This was, admittedly, rather immature of me.) Whilst I was gone with my friends camping, my parents tried to contact me, because my loft bed frame had finally arrived. Not being able to contact me, they decided it was a good idea to swing by my apartment and drop it off. Now, it is my fault that I did not tell them where I was, but I still wonder what drove them to think that stopping by unannounced at my apartment, which is shared with three other tenants, was a good idea. They could have arrived at any number of inconvenient and/or awkward times for the other tenants. So, through a lot of failed communication and irrational thought processes, my parents and I created a wonderful example of the different positions held by the parents and the child upon the child moving out.

            The worst section of time, though, is the part just before a child moves out. Like, when the child is about 18 years old and wants so badly to cut his or her parents loose and run around free in the world. The child desires independence (morally, religiously, physically, monetarily, etc.), but at the same time he or she cannot have it.

            Too many parents think that they have failed as parents if their kid(s) don’t believe exactly what they believe. This, however, isn’t a failure in parenting, but rather a failure in their ideology. For example, many religious parents feel that they have failed in raising their child properly if he/she “strays” from his/her parents’ religious views. Examine this closely and you will see that this is not a failure in parenting. Instead, it is a failure in spreading the religious views further, which is innately what all religious views (as well as all other ideologies) wish to do.

If I were to raise my kid to believe that, say, The Vampire Diaries (a show I, personally, find to be utter garbage) is the best show that ever was and will be, would it really be correct of me to feel that I failed as a parent if my child grows up and realizes that BBC television shows such as are far superior shows to The Vampire Diaries? No. Rather, I should be proud that my child has grown to the point where he/she can judge what is good, even if it were to disagree with my own views.

Personally, I feel that a parent’s job is to raise a child to a level of intellect and maturity such that he or she can go out into the world and independently make rational and informed political, religious, academic, vocational, and moral decisions. Too many parents take this and add “that agree with my views” to the end of it, and that, in this blogger’s opinion, is wrong.

Well, that’s about it for this update.

I’m Michael, and this is my life.

*Update/Disclaimer*: I realized that this may seem like I want all parents to be super loose and not try and teach or guide their kids. This is not accurate. This post is talking exclusively about the time in a child’s life when he/she begins to separate both physically (moving out) and ideologically from his/her parents. It is at this point in life that I believe parents should take a step back and let their kid decide more for him/herself, even if they disagree with him/her. The parents can (and arguably should) still be there as a guide, but they shouldn’t force it.